Tips for Managing Holiday Stress

Popular culture often states this is the ‘most wonderful time of year’, but for many adults, especially those who are neurodivergent, it can be the most daunting. Navigating social pressures, a constant barrage of sensory stimuli, and a lack of structure is a trifecta for feeling overwhelmed. When most people see pretty lights, participate in cherished traditions and experience feelings of ‘good cheer’ many neurodivergent are faced with the choice between participating in socially expected behaviors or their autonomy. While it is not possible to alleviate all stressors, here are a few strategies to help make this season a bit more comfortable.

Measure Your Social Battery
The holiday season is often packed with both personal and professional events. From workplace holiday parties, candlelightings, or an open house, these crowded gatherings, bright lights, and loud music can cause one to think twice about attendance. Remembering you don’t have to say yes to everything is important don’t have to say yes to everything. Choosing activities that match your social battery can help prevent or alleviate burnout. Check in with yourself asking if you have the energy and is the activity meaningful to you. If the answer is yes, and you choose to attend, lan and bring noise-canceling or reducing earplugs/headphones or bring your favorite fidget. Politely declining or leaving early is okay if something feels too much.

Maintain Routine Where Possible
Changes in routine can be a source of anxiety, and the holidays are full of activities unique to this time of year. If you are aware of certain activities that occur each year, such as a family gathering for the last night of Hanukkah or midnight Mass on Christmas Eve, add that to your calendar to help it feel more like part of your routine. Try to find little things that feel familiar, such as sticking to a regular mealtime, sleeping pattern, or even something as small as a cup of tea or other comforting beverage each day. These small consistencies can provide a sense of stability.

Plan for Socialization
Gatherings bring the necessity of social interactions, which can be extremely draining emotionally, mentally, and physically. Don’t hesitate to set boundaries by deciding how long you will stay at events or participate in activities and communicate these to your host if you feel comfortable. Have scripts ready for the unavoidable small talk such as “What are your plans for the holiday?” and other generic questions. Remember to take breaks when you need to. Stepping outside or excusing yourself to the restroom for a few minutes can give a quiet reprieve and a moment for small recharges of your social battery.

Gift Giving
Gift-giving or exchanges can add extra pressure to a gathering. Trying to find the ‘right’ gift for someone can lead to overthinking and anxiety, not to mention the actual procurement of the gift in stores full of people and visual stimulation at every aisle. If gifts are necessary, consider alternatives such as donating to a cause in someone’s name or using an interest or hobby to give handmade gifts.

The holidays don’t have to look a certain way. It’s okay to create your own traditions to fit your needs and preferences. Whether it is spending time with family and friends, finding quiet moments to enjoy, or something completely different, the best holiday is the one that feels right for you.

Let us all celebrate in ways that honor well-being!